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    June 11

    在午夜

       现在是凌晨两点二十四分,不是什么特别的时间,也没有什么纪念意义.只是他刚巧出现在我的视线里,刚巧让我感觉到了他的存在,仅此而已.
       睡不着开着电脑,回想这在这些天所等待的一切,却发现我没有什么在等待,没有什么可等待.有的只是每日的正常工作和回家后用电脑来消磨时光,除此之外,我几乎想不出别的.就连想写些东西似乎也找不到话题.
       这就是现在的我,彷徨中带着迷茫,等待中伴着无助,失落中怀着畅想,清醒中盼着希望.
       生活总是在一天天重复着,重复着,再重复着.几乎找不到兴奋的理由,也只有在平淡中淡然如水,享受着难以捉摸的安静和令人毛骨悚然的寂静.真不知道生活什么时候变成了这个样子.
       想改变的我却找不到那扇可以改变的门,在黑暗中摸着湿冷的墙壁前行,望着远处的一抹亮光却感到那么的遥不可及,除此之外也没有什么是不曾令人失望的.
       带着假面具的日子里,面具上总带着微笑,用红笔勾勒出的嘴角笑得是那么的惨然,血红色与惨白色的绝妙搭配.醒目,但凄凉.
       在午夜,本是故事可多可少的时间,多与少只是有着看见的和看不见的之分,看不见的故事多半也是那么的凄凉.回想时或许还有一丝后怕.面对着午夜的黑暗,那是无尽的深渊,深不可测.四目之下皆近如此.
       那是另一个世界,每个人都有也都无法逃避.
       我们都活在黑暗中,等待被光明救赎.

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    Sept. 10

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